Relax. Enjoy a [European] beer.

And here we go... Over the next six weeks, I will be one of Festung Europa's co-conspirators in one of the ambitious beer tours known since Michael Jackson moon walked his way through Bruges. Sure, this tour is more than just about fermented, non-distilled grains, but if you're looking for a fine European tour guide, consult your favorite Rick Steves or Rough Guide for that. The Defensemaster, Chris Meyer, and I will be giving you a look at Europe from the eye of their beers and beer culture. As a fellow cyber-tourist, we will providing you with suggested beers to drink along the way.

Monday, June 25th begins my tour of Europe in the ancient Viking colony of Iceland. While Scandinavia is quickly becoming a beer haven in its own right, Iceland is a bit behind, only legalizing beer in 1989! Ölvisholt Lava is quite possibly the crown jewel in Iceland's recent burgeoning beer scene and this fine beer has recently become available stateside. I found the beer quite enjoyable, probably a 7.5/10.0. Beginning Monday, I will spend the following three days in Iceland. While this may not be a beer paradise, it's only a warmup for the beer insanity that will follow in the coming weeks.

By Thursday, I will be joined by my friend Jason on the Chris Meyer Experience in Bavaria, the southern region of Germany known for their burgeoning breasts and their fine, sessionable brews. We will spend an evening in Munich before proceeding to an unforgettable and quite possibly alcohol-induced forgettable day in Bamberg.

The servers at Festung Europa's First Annual Gathering of
International Beer Judges. [Ladies, if you were not accepted this year,
fear not. Submit your (nude) photos here!]

On June 30th and July 1st, we will have a Festung Europa exclusive. Over 150 Franconian beers will be tasted and rated by our exclusive, expert panel. Frequent updates will be made on this site. I suggest that all of our viewers frequently refresh this site for exciting exclusive photo and video updates.

From the undeniably exciting Franconian beer tasting, Chris Meyer and I will proceed to Köln, Germany to taste many fine beers of the Kölsch style and will report on the finest establishments in the city to visit. Following Köln, we celebrate our nation's birthday, July the 4th, in Amsterdam, Netherlands. After the Netherlands, we will be providing updates from the famous Dutch brewery of De Molen followed by potentially the best beer restaurant in the world, De Heeren van Liedekercke. I imagine that following this day of beervana will be difficult, but we will then proceed on to Düsseldorf, where we will explore the world of Altbiers.

3 Fonteinen Millennium Geuze is available for $5,000
on some internet websites, but is available for $98 at
Akkurat in Stockholm, Sweden.

At this point, I will fly to Sweden to examine the state of beer in Scandinavia. Quite possibly the most exciting stop of the trip will be Akkurat in Stockholm, Sweden that has one of the, if not the, finest lambic beer cellars in the world. Gothenburg, Sweden should also be a fun stop, as I plan to rendezvous with some fun beer geeks there. After Gothenburg, I will be having a fun beer tour of Jutland, Denmark with my Danish beer friend, René. After two days of debauchery in my Motherland, I will proceed to Copenhagen, Denmark to meet with Henrik Papsoø, a famous Danish beer rater that has tasted and rated over 23,000 beers.

As my Scandinavian travels conclude, I will spend three days traversing Belgium. Stops will include Chez Moeder Lambic Fontainas, the Cantillon Museum/Brewery, Kulminator, and the Struise beer shop in Bruges. If frequent updates are not provided on this fine publication, it's only because I am having more fun than you.

I will be riding the crest of a high, beautiful wave- so now, with the right eyes, you'll be able to see the high water mark where the wave finally broke and rolled back.

Of no relation to this article.

And on to Eastern Europe. I will be joined by many of the most well known European beer raters at a beer rater gathering that will have multiple brewery visits in Vienna, Austria and Bratislava, Slovakia. It goes without saying that a mandatory visit to Prague, Czech Republic will ensue where Chris and I will seek multiple pints of the tastiest beer of our previous Czech beer tour, Pilsner Urquell Kvasnicový, an unfiltered version of Pilsner Urquell.

From here on out, I will be giving frequent updates from Fürth, Germany, where I will be attending multiple beer festivals. One of the most ambitious beer tasting schedule will conclude in possibly the world's finest beer cities, Munich, Germany at the end of July.

It's a grueling schedule that few have ever attempted and none have ever succeeded in completing. But this is vacation. Relax and enjoy a beer.

-Double A

Official Theme Song of all Chris Meyer and

Aaron Nielsen Franconian beer tours

 

Official Theme Song of all Chris Meyer and

Aaron Nielsen Bavarian Autobahn rides

 Mayonnaise will not be rated on this tour.
Official Theme Song of the
"Get Matt Wise to Join Facebook" Movement