Thoughts on Valentine's Day

After an early morning attack upon a sadly-all-too-committed-for-his-own-good Christian on The Des Moines Register webpages, my thoughts turned to Valentine's Day, although I am ill and bedridden at the moment.

Ever since an exchange with a co-worker, Tony Waslosky, at the Wal-Mart Distribution Center in Woodland, Pennsylvania, a few years ago (I think in 2000), my feelings about this holiday will never be the same.

"So, Tony, what did you get your wife for Valentine's Day?"

"Nothing."

"What?! Nothing?! I can't believe it. You are going to catch hell. You should at least get her some flowers."

"What does she need flowers for? When I come home tonight, I'll just give her the root. (thrice thrusts pelvis) Happy...Valentine's...Day!"

Quite a Hallmark moment that was!

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